A smack on the bottom is just a smack. It can be hard or it can be soft, it can hurt or just tease you. But it is just a smack, it doesn't mean much, not in itself. It's what it does to your head that is meaningful.
I have been thinking a lot about what and why and that sort of thing. One thing I think I know is that one of the reasons I want my bottom smacked is that I want someone to be stronger than me. I am not a weak person, I have strength and power in me but I don't want to have to be in control all the time, I want to lose that control, if only for a brief moment.
When I am being spanked I am subject to that spanking and I yield to it and I dare give myself over to it because I only allow people I trust completely to spank me. There aren't that many who are allowed. And with my love, my red haired Felicia, I trust her so much so that she get to decide when and where.
When we were away we met our friends, Kate and Fiona. They are not our only friends but they are our only spanko friends and that is why they are the only ones who are mentioned here.
Anyway, we sat at the pub and the strangest conversation took place. Felicia, Fiona and Kate began talking about spanking me. We sat in a corner and the people beside us were chatting quite loudly but there was still that scary sense that our conversation may be overheard.
There I was listening to these three women talking about spanking, but not spanking in general but about spanking me. Fiona asked if I was spanked often and how, and Kate butted in with some suggestions, like Felicia should use the bath brush more often and they all agreed that I could take this and that many with the belt or so.
I didn't say anything and it was all very absurd. I am sure they know exactly how loudly they spoke and they did it just to unnerve me. Thing is that it really made things with my mind.
It would be so easy to say that I was just excited or even aroused. I was much more. There was this sense of being quite intimidated by it, scared of it, overwhelmed and overcome with it and a quite soft sensation of wanting to yield to it. 'Let them do it, come on and give it to me good. I surrender.'
Later Kate and Fiona got to smack my bottom a little but it was nothing compared to what I felt when we sat there in the pub, almost talking in public, although, I am quite sure no one heard us. Or just fragments.
I will end this post with telling you that for various reasons I don't think I will be able to blog that much for a while. I will definitely be back in August. I will not just stop blogging, when I have had enough I will let you know, not just disappear. Take care and be kind to yourself.